Humorous but Effective Explanation of Cross-Contamination

We have this friend, let’s call him Dave. Dave doesn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom … and better yet, he is your boss.

This year, to cut costs, the Office Holiday Party is at Dave’s house! Yum! Let’s count the number of cross contaminants at the party in his home.

Arriving at the party, Dave greets you at the door. (1-doorknob) He takes your coat (2). Offers you a drink.

Dave grabs a glass (3 bare hands) and some ice (4 no tongs), and stirs it with his finger (5). Best drink you’ve ever tasted.

Little did you know Dave’s hobby is cooking. He made all the appetizers from scratch, with his bare hands (6-20 and that’s just the food not the kitchen itself 21-49). Mmm, very tasty. Would your date like to taste it? He’ll just stick to the bottled beer, although Dave touched that too (50). And he set the table himself.

Somewhere in the conversation, he mentions how he’s been experiencing some intestinal distress.  Then proceeds to brag about the shine on the silverware. He polished it himself (51).

Poor guest haven’t even had a chance to sit down, please try out Dave’s favorite chair (52). He’s proud of this set up. His favorite lamp (53), the remote (54), the phone (55), the paper (56) all within reach on a lovely end table (57). Don’t worry his wife does the dusting! We don’t think Dave has touched anything else in this room. But I vaguely remember the TV being on the fritz recently (58-61)

Dave is so proud of his setup he guides his guests on a tour of his home. First the powder room (61-70 maybe more), lovely decor. Then the Master Bed & Bath (71-90), good thing none of the guests will be spending any time there.

Some of the employees began to feel queasy at this point and asked for their coats.

Needless to say, the party ended rather early.

Traces of contaminated food can be anywhere. And it can be a very serious offense. People with food allergies can react to a trace amount less than a grain of sand.  Other people are additionally contact allergic, they don’t even need to ingest the food, only touch a trace amount to have a reaction. And in either case it could be deadly for the affected person.

So please, always be courteous to our food allergy friends. NO means NO. And although they may come off as “over reacting,” they have good reason.

If nothing else, at least it was funny.